August 25, 2020

One of the best wisdoms I’ve received is to “say yes when you mean yes, and no when you mean no.” It is seemeingly such simple advice, but in actuality, this level of candour demands great self awareness and confidence. It also requires losing face, and maybe even a friend or two, along the way. The Turkish word nazlanmak translates as, “pretending reluctance or indifference when you’re actually willing or eager; saying no and meaning yes.” The inverse is just as common. Feigning enthusiasm for something that neither suits or serves you. I think if we all paid attention, we’d notice the little white lies, sometimes hundreds of them a day, that we unwittingly tell. It’s something I’m trying to be more mindful of, as John Mayer puts it to, “say what you need to say.”


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